The Truth of Us
by FadingIntoYou
Summary: Nick fell in love with Christina before her marriage to Tom, and now things have changed leaving everyone to head in new directions, together and alone. 'It's complicated' takes on a new meaning. **Spoilers from S3 WARNED** Nick/Christina
1. Chapter 1

So, I decided that I was firmly rooting for Nick and Christina because Marc Anthony seems so endearing as Nick and Nick seems to really care for Christina. Whether or not you agree is up to you, but give it a chance.

*All spelling and grammar mistakes are my own.

I do not own this show, it's characters, or are getting paid from it. Sadly I'm still a broke college student*

All of this chapter's in Nick's POV

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><p>Watching Ma and Christina share their secrets and discover fears and ways to concur them, it was a scene I wish I could replay over and over again. Ma had accepted her in the way only Ma could, and it made my stomach flip at thought of Christina surrendering to someone she barely knew to give her a sense of peace she'd been searching for. That had been two days ago, and I can't help but feel like it was wrong of me to ruin their moment. I know Ma didn't mind, but the surprising part was the fact that the tears didn't come until I was there with her, giving Christina tangible proof that no matter what, she was loved. Tom may not like me, may even hate me for being so close to her, but Christina seemed to be content with my presence and that's all that mattered.<p>

Giving myself a mental shake, I decided I'd stood in front of my bedroom door long enough and went to check on Ma. Even before I reached the doorhandle, my mother clucked her tongue in that way that made heat rush up my neck knowing she had a lot on her mind.

"Mijo, she's married" she stated softly, patting the bed beside her as I dropped myself carefully and looked at my ceiling.

"I know Ma, I know"

"No judging mijo, love is love"

_Love is love_. Love isn't just love. Love is pain, happiness, sadness, acceptance and more. Love _couldn't_ just be love between Christina and I. There was Tom, and while I understand that I told her to go to Dr. Wonderful, I can't seem to think that maybe she made a mistake. I'm not knocking what he and Christina have, but Tom is unaware of the amazingly beautiful woman he has and what she's still capable of.

"Ma…"

"I know you love her, why won't you fight for her?"

"What is there to fight Ma? A marriage license?"

He heaved a heavy sigh and turned to look at her. She looked back at him with that _mom _look. He was well past 30 and still understood what it meant; _Stop playing around and do something_.

"What can I do? She made her decision, and I promised I'd be around. I'm not her husband"

"But you are more than a friend"

His ears tinged scarlet at that, remembering the awkward minutes with Tom before his only dinner with Christina. He smiled at the memory, knowing it was a different time that he couldn't ever go back to.

"Go to her"

"But Ma"

"No, mijo. Talk to her, take her out. Make her realize that even if you are not her husband that you are still important. That she is still important to you"

"She'll always be important to me" I responded immediately and realized, even without seeing her knowing smirk, that she had a point.

"Ok, I'll go. But the other two are in the living room if you need anything ok? And if you need me, I'm only a call away"

"Go Nicky, I'll be fine for a few hours"

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><p>Driving up to her house was…interesting. I drove by once to see if Tom was there, but I seemed to luck out this afternoon. Now, the only hard thing was getting Christina to agree.<p>

Knocking on her door, I left my glasses on as to fake an air of calm that I hadn't felt since I'd seen her last with Ma. Seeing her open the door as a rare smile stretched across her beautiful face was enough to calm my nerves. She had this way of putting you at ease and setting off a flame in you all at the same time. It was incredibly enticing in the worst way possible. She was married, and that's the only thought that kept me from leaning across the threshold and stroking her soft cheek, scar and all.

"Hey" she breathed, and I felt my pulse jump at the warm look in her eyes.

"Hey yourself"

"How's your mother doing? She is ok isn't she?" Her face took on a look of instant concern, and I didn't even try to hide my pleased smile.

"She's fine, but she did send me on a mission" I stage whispered to her, leaning in just a little.

"Really? Whatever could she need from me?" She played along, leaning close to me as well.

"She wanted me to man up and ask you to go out with me"

A moment of panic flashed on her face before I rephrased it.

"What I mean is, she thinks we could use some time to just talk, and I completely agree"

"Nick…"

"Please Christina, I know Tom will be upset but…"

"Upset? He'll be furious. But ok."

I started to open my mouth and plead my case before I looked up sharply and just stared at her. She seemed to keep up the trend of surprising me at every turn, and didn't disappoint this time either.

"You look shocked, would you rather I say no?"

"No! No, I really want some time just to be with you"

Her face morphed into a tender look that pulled at my heartstrings, just like the night she cried in my mother's arms.

"Good. What time should I be ready? Tom's working through the night so it isn't a big deal"

"Uh, 8 o'clock ok with you? I know just the place"

"Anything specific I need to know?" She asked intrigued as she noticed the smile on my face widen.

"Wear a dress, and heels. Dancing does have a few requirements"

"Dancing? Well Detective Renata, I hope you're as quick on your feet as you are to my rescue"

"Believe me, being Latino lends me finesse you wouldn't believe" I said winking at her.

She blushed, and I decided it was as good a time as any to leave. This woman was intoxicating in the best and worst way possible.

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><p>Like, don't like? Let me know. The next chapter is written for any of those people (all 1 or 2) of you that actually like this. I just think that since no one was writing Nick and Christina, I'd take the plunge. Christina may not be as true to character as I'd hoped, but I'm working on it.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Welcome back? Thanks **ilylovelynerd **and **WeirdoWaldo**, it's nice to know I'm not the only one!

The songs are "**Curacion**" by Santana and "**I Could Fall In Love**" by Selena for any wondering. Odd that Selena's song inspired me, when Marc's wife J Lo played Selena in the movie? I think not.

First is Christina's POV, then Nick.

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><p>Nick Renata, you are going to be the death of me.<p>

Running around digging for heels here and earrings there wasn't a problem; it was the thought of an evening with no barriers with a man that cares for me unconditionally. Still thinking of him and his mother just the other night made my breath hitch and a warm feeling to coil around me just as her arms did.

Hearing the doorbell ring made me shiver in the nicest way. After everything, it was nice to get dressed up and just go out. My black halter dress hugged my waist and flared out, making me look like it was almost a second skin. Answering the door, I'm surprised I didn't swallow my tongue at the Nick Renata on my doorstep. He was dressed in neat black slacks, but had forgone a tie and just wore a long sleeved shirt that was a deep burgundy color and a leather jacket over his arm. He had a commanding presence but the soft look in his eyes gave him away.

"You look…absolutely breathtaking" he breathed out; looking me over again as he slowly met my eyes. There was a fire I'd only seen glimpses of before, and it made me feel that much more special; like he actually tried to will me to understand how beautiful he thinks I am.

"You look handsome as well, shall we get going?" I asked eagerly, knowing I'd enjoy every minute with him tonight.

"Yeah, your carriage awaits"

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><p>The slow dance was one thing, but after dinner this was something that finally registered as dangerous. I normally understand boundaries, but Christina, in that dress, had to be some kind of test. The way her hips swayed was sinful and a better man would have bowed out and took her home before things got…interesting.<p>

Unfortunately, I'm only human, and the better man was nowhere in sight tonight.

As "Curacion" came over the speakers in the quiet studio I'd gotten through a few favors, I knew the elephant in the room was going to be addressed whether I wanted it to or not. Gently pulling her to me, we started to sway and spin in time to the slow, sultry beat.

As I held her closer, she leaned her head against my chest, entwining our fingers together as she laid them over my heart. I could feel her pulse racing despite her calming gesture, being just as affected as I was. As the song came to a close, I'd moved us close to a wall that I softly pushed her against. Her eyes were bright with excitement that made my pride swell at seeing her so carefree.

"Having a good time?" I questioned softly, keeping my voice at a whisper with us so close together.

"It's…exhilarating" she whispered back, smiling as a new song started.

"What's this song called Nick" she added bashfully. Now it was my turn to be shy.

"Well…" After earning a quick glare, I swallowed my ego and told her.

"I Could Fall in Love" I whispered, as I kept her hand against my heart, the only contact we've kept after the last song ended.

She stiffened and I was going to pull away when she pulled me closer, telling me to let her listen to the song longer. I waited a beat, holding my breath as her eyes slipped closed and she leaned her forehead against our hands. It was the most intimate we'd ever been, and I honestly couldn't say I'd want to be anywhere else right now.

She straightened up, bringing me closer and keeping contact as she leaned her head back against the wall. I was in direct contact with her, making me feel hot as if the temperature spiked 15 degrees in the last minute alone. My chest brushed hers as we took deep breaths, my other hand coming up to rest on the back of her neck as hers did the same to me, brushing my collar with her fingers. She took a deep breath and sang the lyrics that made my stomach clench in anticipation.

"I could fall in love, with you…"

I licked my lips and quickly made up my mind.

"I could fall in love, with you too" I whispered back in time with the music, bringing my hand to lightly caress her cheek and neck. She opened her eyes to meet the fire I knew mine held, holding her breath as my fingers created a gentle dance across her skin.

As I went back to cradling her neck, I gently brought her head closer as I leant in. I gave her every opportunity to stop me, but she seemed just as entranced as I was. As I brought her lips a breath away from mine, I realized she was willing to kiss me just as much as I wanted to kiss her and that stopped me cold. She felt me freeze and continued to lean in as I leaned bad and took a step away. Her face took on a look of hurt, before she realized why I'd stepped back.

"Tom" she whispered

"Tom"

"Oh Nick…"

"It's ok Beautiful, I'm a big boy"

I managed to smile weakly as I let go of her hand, instantly missing the contact.

"Nick, there's something you should know"

"I'm ok really Christina"

"I can't have any more kids" she blurted out, and I looked up sharply, wondering why she was telling me this.

"Tom knows and says that he'll honor our promise, but I saw him with kids today and I know he wants them. He was hurt, and I honestly don't think we'll be able to do this when we want different things"

I finally caught up with her after that bomb, realizing what she _wasn't_ saying. She couldn't give him kids, and knew it would tear them apart in the end. She was acknowledging the fact that her marriage was over in her eyes and I refused to feel hopeful. It all seemed too right.

"Tom loves you, that shouldn't matter to him. He'll want to be with you because you're an amazing, brilliant, loving woman. Don't doubt that"

Even as I said the truth, it killed me to do it. I didn't want to give her reasons to stay with him, but telling her it was over didn't sit well with me either.

"He does love me, but I refuse to be the woman he stays with when he can find someone that can give him everything I can't" she said with that determined look on her face I've seen before. She'd made up her mind, but for tonight, she was still married.

"Christina, you need to talk to Tom about this, see what he thinks" I said as I walked away to turn the music off and grab my jacket. As I turned, she hadn't moved and I stayed put as she formed what she looked to be struggling to say.

"You'll be there though, won't you?" she asked in a small voice, "To be dumb enough to catch me?"

I smiled a genuine smile as she quoted my words back at me, walking towards her.

"If he's smart enough to let you go, of course I will"

I held out my hand and entwined our fingers as we made our way back to the car, holding on to the last piece of an unforgettable evening.

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><p>Thank you for caring enough to continue reading! Review or don't, but there's another chapter written too :)<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Back again! I understand this fic isn't a popular idea, but Nick is a more attractive character to me overall than Tom's. Ever since they fought about Erin last season, he'd made me weary of his character. I understand I don't need to defend my opinion, but thought it deserved some clarity for those that care.

Thanks **ilylovelynerd**, **Babyshaq99**, and **HuddyFan21 **for reviewing, I appreciate the little comments and encouragement.

By the way, Harry Potter was AMAZING (for any of you that actually care)

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><p>I was sleeping peacefully before I felt a lone finger repeatedly poke me in the side, before moving to scratch my scalp lightly. I refused to turn over and face another interrogation by Ma and what I assumed were both of my brothers by the horrible not so quiet whispers about how I was still in my dress shirt.<p>

"So...how was it?"

Mikey was the first to pipe up, my other brother just looking at me with a curious smile. Ma, as usual, encouraged the question, no doubt more interested in the answer than Mikey or Carlito. I sighed and stuck a pillow over my face before I sat up next to Ma, ready to get it over with.

"It was, amazing"

"That's it? All we get is 'amazing' as you look like a love struck teenager? Ma, he can't be serious!"

"Mikey…" she said in that warning tone that gave me hope, until she turned to me with a neutral expression but with that one eyebrow raised.

"Nicky, please. How was it, what did you do? Did she have a nice time?" It was sweet Ma wanted to make sure Christina was taken care of.

"She said, and I quote" as my brother's leaned forward eagerly, "it was exhilarating. I took her dancing in a private studio a friend let me borrow. We didn't talk much before the dancing, but after we did and it was nice"

"Ok, I'm not one to pry, but even I think you're leaving something major out" Carlito added in.

"Cállate por favor! Some things are private guys" I huffed, and felt like a teenager being asked about my first girlfriend again. All my brother's did was laugh as Ma insisted she was hungry and they all but tripped over each other so she wouldn't have to lift a finger.

"Mijo, is that really all?"

"Ma, she said it wasn't gonna work out"

"I'm so sorry"

"No Ma, her and Tom. We were so close and she let me know she knew they weren't going to last. Is it bad to want to hope?"

"Nicky, it's never bad to hope. Sometimes that's all we have"

I looked at her, and all I saw was the same honesty I've always gotten when I asked her something. It reassured me in a way I didn't know I needed, but I released the breath I didn't know I was holding.

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><p>Waking up this morning was bittersweet to say the least. Last night with Nick had been, the best night I've ever had with a man. While I feel guilty for thinking that, he made me feel wanted in a way I'd never realized before. I opened one eye to the bright morning light and noticed a note on Tom's pillow. All he wanted to say was, "Emergency surgery, we'll talk this afternoon". Him having to work this morning's a blessing in disguise.<p>

I really can't be upset, since we left things tense yesterday. The hurt and anger were palpable as Miles' kids sat asleep between us. I knew Tom wanted to cry in frustration, but working that night had been for the best. I know it's wrong to hope he agrees with us not being together, but really? What choice did we have? He needs a wife that can give him 2.5 kids, and I can't ever do that. I wouldn't forgive myself if I knew I was keeping him from the happiness he deserved. If he would only see it that way-

"Mom, you're thinking way too loud"

I shot up as Camille stood in the doorway, holding a glass of orange juice as she studied me.

"You ok?"

"No honey, I'm not. Come sit next to me"

As I moved over to make room for her, Camille just looked at me concerned as I tried to get the words out.

"Camille, I can't have any more children"

"Oh mom! I'm so sorry…"

"It's ok, I'm ok with that"

Camille gave that that disbelieving look before focusing on me again.

"Really, I am. But, I know Tom won't be. And that's why…"

"You don't want to be with him anymore do you?" she asked tentatively.

"Oh sweetie, that's not really it"

"Mom, be honest. If you don't think you guys can get past this, than do what's best for you"

I just stared at her, I really couldn't believe it. My 19 year old daughter told me to be selfish and worry about me for a change. I think I'm in shock.

"Don't look so freaked, I've seen you and Det. Renata together. Tom loves you, but Nick _adores_ you and wants you to be happy even if it's with someone else. Which reminds me, how _was_ last night?"

"How did you-"

"Seriously? The dress on the floor was a dead giveaway; heels just dropped on your floor were too"

"Camille, it's not what it looks like"

"Chill, if you and Tom can't get over not having kids and still wanting to be together, then maybe there's someone else that deserves the right to try"

"When in the hell did I get such an intelligent daughter?"

"Since you realized I'm not going to make life difficult by throwing tantrums. Talk to Tom, then see how ya feel ok mom?"

"Ok"

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><p>Waiting for Tom for a few hours wasn't nearly as long as I thought it'd be, and it made my stomach ache with uncertainty. Who ever looks forward to telling their husband that they don't think things are going to work anymore? Hearing the door open almost made my heart stop, but I reminded myself that I had to stay strong for both of us. Seeing Tom's tight smile gave me a bit of strength to jump right into everything as I followed him into our room.<p>

"Tom, we really need to talk-"

"Where'd you go?"

"What are you talking about? I was home all day…"

"Then what's with the dress and shoes in a pile?"

"Oh that…we'll get to that in a bit. But what I really had to say was-"

"Christina, where did you go?" He said again, and I could feel his anger building.

"I went out with Nick. His mother-"

"Nick! What the fuck Christina? I told him to stay away from you and asked the same of you. Why in the hell did you agree?" he asked, turning to me and looking at me accusingly.

"God Tom, he just wanted to spend some time together. All we did was dance"

"You went on a date with him! While I'm trying to think up ways to save our marriage you're out-"

"Out _what_ Tom?" I asked, my temper getting the best of me.

"Out dating another guy! I get that we can't have kids but that doesn't mean it gives you the right to cheat on me!"

"Cheat on you! All we did was dance! I would never do that to you, despite what you may think"

"Yeah, well Nick has been getting in the way since the beginning and I'm sick of it. You need to choose"

Gaping, I tried to determine if Tom was actually being serious. Geez, this really was going to be a bloodbath.

"Tom, Nick never got in the way of anything. You were with Erin and I went on one date with Nick. I loved you and he was the one to tell me to tell you before you got away. If it weren't for Nick, we may not even be married!"

"Then I have Nick to thank for making my marriage happen and for it falling apart" he spat out.

"He isn't to blame! You need a wife that can give you kids and I can't! I refuse to feel bad over something I can't control"

"Then what? You regret marrying me?"

"No Tom, but you thought we were having a baby, and now we aren't and can't ever again" I added sadly, sitting on the edge of the bed. Tom sat on the other side facing me.

"Is this what we'll be doing? Fighting over things that won't change?"

"If we stay together yeah"

"Jesus Christina, I love you"

"And I love you. But, you deserve more. You'll resent me in the end and I can't bear to have that happen"

"So we're really over huh" he asked, looking at me as if to make sure _I_ was sure.

"It seems that way. It's for the best, we can't keep going on like today and end up hating each other"

"I still hate Nick" he added petulantly as I got up.

"I know, but he's still close to me and that isn't going to change, despite how you might feel" I said boldly, picking my dress off the floor.

"All you did was dance" he asked unsurely, afraid of my answer.

My stomach dropped as last night flashed behind my closed eyes, feeling disappointed but reassuring him that nothing happened. Specifics would hurt him no matter how innocent, and that isn't my intention.

"So…does Nick know about this?" he asked suspiciously.

"Yes..." I said, and regretted it the second the word left my lips.

"You told him before you discussed it with me?" There was his anger again.

"It just came out while we were there Tom, don't try to make it bigger than it is"

"He's always been the other member of our marriage Christina. How am I supposed to feel?"

"Relieved! I wouldn't have handled this nearly as well if Nick hadn't been there for me to vent to for a bit"

"I give up! I need space while we decide how to do this"

"Where are you going?"

"I'll stay in a hotel, this will be hard enough"

"Tom, it doesn't have to be hard"

"Yes it does" Sighing, I gave in.

"We had no pre nuptial agreement. Do you really want anything that's mine?"

"No, I need to start new. I'll move out as soon as possible" he said as he threw things in a duffle bag. I wanted to cry that he was in a sense, leaving me, but this was exactly what we needed. I understand he's angry, but when he has a kid of his own, he'll thank me.

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><p>I love this, but a little sad huh? Eh, anyway...I would prolong the whole separation, but when others do that in stories I get impatient so I'm not really gonna do that here.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Just as a side note, my parents are still together so I have no idea how long divorce takes, so bear with my inexperience in this area.

Anyone else think those few minutes together were insanely hot? I do, just saying. He is passionate...

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><p>Four months had passed with not so much as a text message from Nick, and it's starting to make me worried. I'd picked up my phone numerous times, just to put it back down in uncertainty. Tom had wasted no time in getting a lawyer and drawing up papers, keeping everything he had before our marriage and me keeping everything that was mine. We ran into a few problems when it came to dividing up the wedding gifts, but I pushed him to take everything; I didn't want to keep things that reminded me of what I was giving up. It seemed wrong to look at a coffee machine <em>we<em> were given if I ever expected to move on. He'd moved into an apartment not far from the hospital only a few weeks ago. Thankfully he was being civil, until he found out Nick's mom had to come into the hospital for an appointment. That was going to be interesting. Kelly had seen her and let me know, her being the only other person to talk to since Bobbi was…well busy.

Seeing Nick's mom disappear around the corner, I hurried to catch up; extremely disappointed that it was Mike that was there instead of Nick.

"Mrs. Renata, how are you feeling?" I said, catching her as she was about to sit down, just to get back up and stand in front of me. She looked at me with a look that could have been intrusive to others, but just seemed to be full of concern for me.

"Christina, mija! It's so good to see you again" she said as she hugged me, and I couldn't help but tighten my grip around her.

"You too, how are you feeling" I continued to talk to her as she sat, Mike sitting next to her with a blank expression on his face; very different from when we first met.

"Good, I'm feeling good enough to cook again"

"Ah, I thought those fine sons of yours were taking care of you"

I shot an innocent smile at Mike, and he just looked at me, not sure what to say.

"They are" she said, and leveled me a look that was part questioning, part concern again. This woman was just too kind sometimes.

"Uh, so how's Nick?"

I looked at Mike and saw him scoff and get up, and I didn't understand what I'd done wrong.

"Mikey, mijo, can you get me coffee por favor" He shot me a skeptical look, but nodded his head before leaving us alone.

"Nicky is different mija," she said as she grabbed my hands "he looks lost, and my son is one that is sure in everything he does"

"Yeah, I've noticed"

"Then you understand why Mikey is upset"

"I do and I don't. Nick and I talked, and it seemed as if we had reached some kind of understanding, then he doesn't call me at all in the last four months" I said, knowing the hurt had seeped into my voice as her grip tightened only briefly before she patted my hands.

"He understands the need for space, but I think he was hoping you would need him sooner rather than later"

"He could have called me"

"Called a married woman when she was trying to fix things with her husband? Even if he was worried, he knows you" she said, eyebrow raised, and I understood that she knew it wasn't a good idea, no matter how pure the intention.

"I know, but I miss him" I admitted in a small voice.

"And he misses you. But it isn't his place to be there when you are in such turmoil"

"But I need him! Tom already has papers drawn up, all we need is to finish signing them next week and it's finally over"

"You need him?"

I instantly ducked my head to hide the blush I could feel on my face. I'd been fighting admitting it out loud, but I'd acknowledged the fact that I did need Nick. Not to help me get through the process or over Tom, but just because he was _Nick_. I wanted him to be there when it was done, to know what I need in that moment and just be with me. No future plan, no past resentment, just us in that moment.

"Yeah" I answered softly, "I really do"

She stayed quiet as I ran my eyes over her hands; warn from years of cooking, cleaning, and raising three sons. I continued to look down until she started speaking, making me freeze.

"Then here is your chance"

Just as she said that, I heard the lobby doors slide open and heard Nick great his mom before noticing me.

"Hey stranger" I let out lowly

Nick just looked at me, and was distracted by his brother coming back with coffee and greeting him.

"It's about time you got here, Ma was just about to go in for her checkup" he said, watching as Nick's eyes dropped mine and focused on his brother.

"Good, Ma you need me to go in with you?"

"No mijo, I think you can wait out here. Mikey can go"

"But Ma…"

"Michael Antonio-"

"Ok ok! I'm coming!" he said, and smiled suggestively at Nick, meeting my eyes again, this time giving me a genuine smile and a nod of his head before they passed through the door.

Nick shoved his hands in his pockets as he took a deep breath.

"Let's walk"

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><p>Running late isn't something I'm accustomed too, but everyone looking at me like a criminal does make it harder to leave the precinct for something like a doctor's appointment. I parked and walked briskly towards the doors, pulling my sunglasses off and putting them in my pocket. I haven't seen or heard from Christina since that night four months ago, and I'm surprised that I don't feel as anxious going into the hospital as I thought I would. It probably had to do with her not working there, but she did have an knack for popping up.<p>

As my thoughts pulled away from that particularly painful topic, I saw Ma through the doors with someone, and I instantly looked for Mikey as I said hi, only to be stopped in my tracks by Christina talking to me. I was determined to say something, anything to her when Mikey decided that was the best time to come into the room. I watched as Ma and Mikey left Christina and me alone, knowing there were things that had to be said.

"Let's take a walk"

Watching Christina watch me was nerve wracking; I'm the one that's used to watching her, but her eyes studying me make me squirm for the first time in years. I looked her over as she glanced around the hospital, and the first thing I noticed was the circles under her eyes that hadn't been there a few months ago. I then noticed how she'd lost only a little weight, but wore these tight jeans and forest green button up that was pleasantly tight across her chest. It was almost as if nothing had changed, the silence between us more comfortable than awkward as we made our way to the same bench we'd been on almost a year before.

As we sat, I noticed she sat closer to me than usual and faced me, leaving her hands open in her lap and that was when I'd realized what I'd been looking for; the wedding ring that used to take residence on her hand was nowhere in sight, leaving behind only a faint tan line that most would miss. Just as I was about to open my mouth, she started in head first, as Christina always has.

"Look Nick, I know it's been a long four months-"

"Christina I-"

"but I want you to know that I wasn't ignoring you on purpose-"

"I know, but Christina-"

"it's just been really messy-"

"Hey!"

I didn't mean to sound sharp, but the only way I was going to get a word in edge wise was if I stopped her mid sentence. She looked at me sharply, obviously annoyed at being interrupted, but let me speak.

"Don't worry about a thing Beautiful, life happens"

She just gaped at me, and I couldn't help but laugh. She probably thought I'd be mean because I was hurt, but I really can't do that to her. I care for her too much to make her think I don't. Mind games never really were my thing.

"I told you, I'd be dumb enough to catch you. I'm here aren't I?"

"Yeah, yeah you are"

"Then it's Dr. Wonderful's loss. Now I get you all to myself" I said, winking at her, making her laugh.

"Well, I guess I'll be lucky enough to get a second date next week right?"

"Why next week?"

"Tom and I sign the papers next week; then I'm a free woman"

_A free woman_. That sounded like an amazing thing. This woman doesn't have any clue how much I care about her and all she wants is a chance at a second date. Sometimes I think she forgets how wonderful she really is.

"Well then, how can I say no to a night alone with a single, beautiful woman that I adore?"

"It's funny you say that, Camille said something about you adoring me a few months ago, the night after we went out"

"I told you she had your DNA; how could she not be as smart as her mother?" I added, putting my hand over hers on her thigh. She flipped her hand over and wrapped her fingers around mine. It was nice to be close to her again; I missed this.

"That may be right, but she has a thing for older black men while I…"

"Like older white men?" I laughed as she hit me in the shoulder, laughter escaping her as well. She really does have an incredible laugh, but I may be biased.

"I was going to say sexy Latin men but-"

"No, sexy Latino men is good. I'd prefer one sexy Puerto Rican, but it'll do"

"I'm glad you approve"

"I'd approve of anything you do, you're simply the most exquisite woman I know, besides Ma, but that's a given"

"Speaking of your mother, I think we should go see if she's good to go home"

"True. Come on Ms. Hawthorne, I'm sure she's dying to be nosy like always"

She and I laughed as we got up off the bench, holding hands still, but this time I intertwined our fingers and brushed a kiss across her knuckles before we headed towards the door. She looked at me with that tender look again and I had to remind myself that we had a week; after next week, I could kiss her and no one could tell me it was wrong.

Just as we made our way to the doors, I saw Ma talking to Tom through the glass and dropped Christina's hand and took a step sideways. She looked questioningly at me as I motioned inside where she noticed Tom. We walked through and I went to give Ma another hug as Tom looked up and glared at me, then to my surprise, Christina. Mikey just winked at me and gave Christina a smile as he noticed I was in a better mood.

"Nicky, they said I was doing better"

"I'm relieved to hear that Ma. Now, let's get you home"

"Wait, Mija, would you like to come to dinner tomorrow night?" she asked Christina. She froze as she noticed Tom glare at us a second time before leaving, irritated that she and Ma were close.

"Tom-"

"Next week Christina. Next week" he said as he walked away.

"I'd love to, but can we do this next week. I have a lot to do and next week would be," she looked at me and winked, "perfect. Friday ok?"

"Yes, I will make sure the boys don't burn anything"

"Ma!" Mikey and I said in unison, before they laughed at us again.

"Sounds great. I'll see you then" she said as Ma and Mikey walked away.

"I'll see you next week then I guess?"

"You bet" She replied, and linked her pinky with mine before walking away.

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><p>I am seriously considering writing something between them like that on the show somewhere in the next chapter or two. Anyone else game? I have a few ideas...<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

This chapter kind of needed to happen, I hate it in a way, but love it all the same. I will get more time to write since I'll be away on vacation with nothing but free time and…entertaining godparents. I really wish people would message me for ideas or just to chat about recent episodes. My mom loves me, but I think she thinks I'm a little _too_ invested in this show. In the words of Clueless, _**as if! **_Enough of my weirdness, on with the chapter that leads to the great beyond…

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><p>The next week was a huge blur, until Tuesday came. I'd gotten my job back the day before, but it didn't make the week any easier. I'd known for weeks that this was the last time I'd ever be Tom's wife, but I really couldn't seem to force myself to feel remorseful. Tom isn't the same man I thought I was marrying, and being so close to Nick made that glaringly obvious. I'm mentally and physically exhausted from just that one last meeting with our lawyers, Tom seemed to make it that much harder for me. He barely looked at me, and once the papers were signed, he smiled and said that there were more important things he had to be doing. It stung that I was no longer one of those important things, but I refused to let him get the best of me. The next morning though, I really didn't think I'd make it when <em>she<em> walked in.

**Flashback (she's thinking back to Wednesday, on the Friday morning of her dinner with Nick's family)**

I was standing at the nurses' station when I'd heard Bobbie stop talking in mid sentence and poke me hard in the ribs as I was bent over looking at the computer. I looked up and froze, knowing exactly why she'd thought it was safe to poke me.

"Is that-"

"Yeah Bobbie, yeah it is"

The woman walked in with a wide eyed look as she was greeted by other doctors and such, and unfortunately spotted Bobbie and I and made her way over. If there was any possible way for the Earth to open up and swallow me, it was then.

"Hey Nurse Hawthorne, have you seen Tom? He said he'd meet me down here but I can't seem to find him"

Erin said it with her sweet country twang and it instantly put me on edge. I knew why Tom had told her to wait down here; I'd just come back and I was spending almost all of my time at this station. He knew I'd run into her and I'm guessing he was trying to hurt me. When I got a text message, I really tried not to smile at the timing. I'm beginning to think I'm transparent or I send out and invisible Bat signal when in distress.

"You know what? You can stay here until he comes down, Bobbie will even page him to make sure he's on his way" I said with a huge smile. She looked at me as if I'd gone mental, both her and Bobbie, but as I turned to continue my search, I heard the elevator ding just as the doors opened.

"So that's why everything's so wonderful huh…" Bobbie said thoughtfully as she laughed behind her hand. Nick had just come in and Tom was just now getting off the elevator. As Nick approached me, I smiled and came around the desk, eager to give him a hug for saving me from one hell of an awkward situation. He pulled me in tight to him and breathed a 'hi Beautiful' in my ear. I shivered and let go and turned to Erin just as Tom was a few yards away.

"Oh! I'm Erin, and you are?"

"Detective Nick Renata. It's nice to meet you Erin" he replied as he shook her hand and then put it around me. She looked pleased as Tom approached.

"So, how long you two been together?"

"It's all still new" I said, as Tom glared again at Nick before making his presence known.

"Hey Erin, I'm glad you're here"

"Hi Tom, I was just talking to Nurse Hawthorne and Detective Renata here" she smiled as she put her arms around him in a hug. He looked at me again over her shoulder and I leaned more into Nick's side.

"Oh. Well we should get going, lunch is always a crazy time" he said awkwardly as he kept looking from Erin to Nick.

"Ok. Well, it was nice meeting you. Bye"

As Erin and Tom walked away, he slipped his hand into hers and she just smiled up at him; it was slightly nauseating.

Bobbie looked up from her computer again, this time ending her charade of working as she watched the four of us interact.

"Well that was awkward"

"You're telling me. Your time is impeccable Nick"

"I was just worried you weren't eating; I think that was about as fun as a root canal"

"Sounds about right. Hey Bobbie, can you hold down the fort for an hour while I'm gone?"

"Seriously?"

I looked at her puzzled as I made a grab for my jacket.

"You're actually taking an entire hour to be _away_ from the hospital? I think I need to mark the date on a calendar or something"

She laughed and I could hear Nick join in from behind me and it irritated me only because I was still off balance with the whole Erin thing.

"I can stay" I challenged with my arms crossed, until I felt Nick behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"You don't wanna do that" he whispered in my ear, "You know you've missed me. I've sure as hell missed you" he finished. All I could do was lean my head back and try to control the heat and arousal that hit me like a freight train. He was too sexy sometimes.

"You're right, I did miss you" I said as I turned in his arms and looped mine around his neck. He lightly bumped his nose against mine and I could feel more than see his smile growing like mine.

"Awwww! Isn't that just the cutest thing you've ever seen?"

Breaking the moment between us, we both turn to see Kelly almost giddy and bouncing on the balls of her feet as she looks back and forth between us. We could only laugh as she gave us a hug at the same time, forcing us to withdraw the hold we had on each other.

"Thank you Kelly, but don't you have something to do" I asked pointedly.

"Other than witness the cutest PDA?" No not really"

I smiled again as Nick laughed his husky laugh, and the sound made me feel hot all over again.

"Well, we do so if you don't mind us…We'll be going now" He waved to Bobbie and Kelly as he gently nabbed my wrist and pulled me down the hallway towards the doors. He let go of me long enough to lace our fingers together and slow our walk to briefly kiss the knuckles on my hand, then placing a delicate kiss on my palm. All I could hear besides the blood rushing in my ears and the racing of my heart was another squeak from Kelly that made Nick laugh as we continued walking.

It was easy with Nick; easy to give into the subtle touches and the displays of affection because I knew he _meant_ them. It wasn't to claim me as his, but really, the only way he knew to show me that I mean something to him at all times. It's endearing to say the least, and that isn't a word I would have thought to use when it comes to him. He surprises me in the best ways, and I think I could honestly get used to this.

**End Flashback**

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><p>I shook my head as I ran up to my office to grab a few things when I saw another great first week back. As I rounded the corner, Tom and Erin were outside his office, sharing a kiss before I ducked down a corridor, trying to forget what I'd just seen. I know I've felt something for Nick for some time now, but to know that Tom could bounce back that fast really hurt. As I turned t once again make my way to my office, I almost ran directly into Tom, him leaning the opposite way at just the right moment. We stood in the empty hall for a few minutes, just staring at one another with an unusually awkward tension between us.<p>

"So…you and Erin huh?" I asked, and he got that guarded look on his face, one that I've become quite familiar with.

"What? Just because you have a…Nick, I'm not allowed to move on?"

"I'm not saying that Tom-"

"I like Erin, she's always been someone I could count on"

"Then why the hell did you marry me!" I yelled, my temper once again, flaring before I had a chance to stop it.

"You know what, I honestly don't know. At least with Erin, there weren't any secret passage ways and clues to decode. She was upfront with what she wanted; she was always honest with me"

"So was I-"

"Oh really? Then why didn't you tell me you've had feelings for Nick for a while?"

"I didn't"

"Don't lie! I see the way he is with you! He's always near you and holding your hand and it makes me sick!"

"Then you know what you can do? Don't look! I don't give a damn if you hate him, you have no right to have a say in what I do now"

"Did I ever?"

I stopped, not fully understanding him, until he just looked at me and turned to walk away. Just as he was about to round the corner, he stopped and turned to me one final time.

"Do what you want Christina. We have nothing to do with one another anymore" and with that he walked away. I slammed my hand against the wall and continued to my office, deadest on calling Nick to make sure dinner was still on tonight. Now my problems with Tom were officially done.

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><p>Like? I know, short, but I had to get this out to get onto a fresh start for next chapter. I understand I've been away for what…a week or so? My mom's still bouncing back a little after surgery a few months ago and it sometimes has to take priority over my writing. Please give some feedback, I want to know if anyone cares that I want to continue or not.<p> 


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